We tried uberVINO last weekend and made a list of Wine Tour Dos and Don'ts

We tried uberVINO last weekend and made a list of Wine Tour Dos and Don'ts

Uber Perth are offering designated drivers this October so you can take on the Swan Valley.

Words by Dave Gardiner. Photos by some idiot.

Disclaimer: Uber Perth covered our expenses last weekend to give their new uberVINO option a spin in the Swan Valley. And we're not sure about you, but if we get the option to spend a day drinking and eating in the Swan Valley for free then we're damn sure gonna take it.

Biiig shoutout to UberVINO for an amazing Saturday (and fairly crippled Sunday) last weekend as we swanned through the valley with the first decent weather in months, filling ourselves with wine, beer and cheese until we wouldn’t move. This is the first wine tour I had
ever been on that didn’t involve a bus full of mostly strangers/possible liabilities and it was an absolute cracker of a time.

The $40 per-hour service (1.5hr minimum) ends up being bugger all in a car of 4 peeps, and we came up with a few dos & don’ts based on how our day went down so you can improve your next wine tour experience:

uber vino 07


- Pick your wine tour buddies carefully, you’re stuck with a version of them that progressively gets drunker over next few hours - so you want to pick your MVPs for game day.


- Become the type of drunk you didn’t want your friends to be (aka me after 3rd winery – soz Lancaster Estates).

uber vino 03


- Try everything. You never go to wine tours, so use this time to get cultured ya drongo. The process is this: the winery staff suggest things, you drink it, then you talk about the wine you drank like you know what you’re doing. I suggest parroting phrases like “hmmm the recently googled wine word in this wine type are quite adjective, with subtle hints of random fruit balanced with anything edible you can think of .” Typically you’ll pretend to appreciate wine for the first 1.5 hours before the bender truly reveals itself.


- Try everything in the same glass – this goes for you Errun and your red wine & sparkling abomination (“Yeah…nah… I mean I wouldn’t do it again”).

uber vino 10


- Be good to your transport on the day – they have to put up with your drunk alter ego, the annoyances of long drives AND chilling in the getaway car so you can have a belter of a time. This goes for winery/brewery staff on the day too – they deal with people that
can’t handle their shit on the reg, so do them a solid and handle yours for an A+ day.


- Forget to show some love to those who made your day – throw 5 stars to your Uber driver, chuck a like on your favourite wineries’ pages, or even just thank staff to let them know you’ve enjoyed yourself.

uber vino 14


- Take photos. Heaps. The boujee-er, the better. Vogue in vineyard. Pout with some pinot. Do that classic boomerang of wine sipping or sunlight-thru-the-glass shot. We’ll all guilty of this shit anyway but it’s a wine tour sOoOoO just commit to the bit and enjoy yourself, because it's the only way you'll remember everything the next day.


- Expect the photos to be any good.

uber vino 04


- Avoid the Buck’s/ Hen’s functions.


- Go near the Buck’s/ Hen’s functions. Trust me, fam.

uber vino 19


- Try UberVINO – we really enjoyed how well the day flowed, the service and the convenience of a wine tour scaled to our group. If you’ve got the Uber app its super simple to book it and get rolling, so if you’re looking to accomplish some day-drinking when the sun comes out for good this is definitely a top way to get it done.

uber vino 13

Cinepile: Broad City Is F*cking Awesome

Yes we're a season late, but damn this show is funny.

9 years ago

Lost In Paradise

Three days, three different writers covering their favourite new festival - Lost Paradise.

8 years ago

CinePile: The Conjuring 2's Enfield Haunting: Paranormal Hoax or Horror?

The Enfield Haunting had its share of skeptics - we delve into the history of the supernatural shiftiness surrounding Ed & Lorraine Warren's investigations.

7 years ago