It’s up to Tigerlily who sees her naked, not you

It’s up to Tigerlily who sees her naked, not you

Let’s take this opportunity to talk about consent, and ownership.

[Update: Tigerlily has set up a fundraising account for Headspace to help stop online bullying. Whatever your thoughts on the below, it's a great cause, and you can head HERE if you'd like to contribute.]

Yesterday someone downloaded a snapchat video of Tigerlily revealing herself fully naked under a bathrobe, with parts of her covered in emojis or graphics. That same person knew how to separate the video from the drawings/emojis, leaving Tigerlily fully naked, and began disseminating that to the internet. This then prompted hundreds of people to screenshot the vid, and post the naked photo of Tigerlily to her Facebook wall en masse, and who knows where else.

Whether or not she should have posted this to Snapchat is irrelevant, so let’s get one thing straight, it’s not up to us to decide who gets to see her naked. It’s up to her.

Tigerlily’s no stranger to the male gaze, and part of her “brand” is very much her sexuality, and incorporating her looks and body into what has become a global force in the EDM community. The fact she backs it up with being someone who can DJ and produce (if you want to argue about ghost writers/producers let’s look at any number of top level DJs around the world, not just Tigerlily) means she gets to travel the world, earn great money, and has become one of the most globally recognised DJs (female or otherwise) in the world.

What this unfortunately also means is that it opens her up to a really ugly side of fandom – and one wander through the Facebook comments of her photos will reveal a depressing large number of thirsty men, very ready to chime in with commentary like “sit on my face”, “show us your tits”, “the things I’d do to that”… and much, much worse.

This recent development isn’t a scandal, it’s a sex crime. It’s misogyny. It’s bullying. And it’s abhorrent. As the photo began to circulate hundreds of men couldn’t wait to post the photo directly to her Facebook wall, shaming her with a photo she gave no permission to be seen by the outside world. You can argue it shouldn’t have been posted to Snapchat. I’ll argue that she has every right to do with her body what she chooses – you do not.

The second that the original video is altered from how it was originally sent out, is the second consent is removed from the image. This quote from an article pertaining to the Jennifer Lawrence photo hack scandal says it better than I can:

You may argue, without any intended malice, that it may be unwise in this day-and-age to put nude pictures of yourself on a cell phone which can be hacked and/or stolen. But without discounting that statement, the issue is that these women have the absolute right and privilege to put whatever they want on their cell phones with the expectation that said contents will remain private or exclusive to whomever is permitted to see them just like their male peers. The burden of moral guilt is on the people who stole said property and on those who chose to consume said stolen property for titillation and/or gratification.

Moral guilt. How can you feel comfortable taking a screenshot of that video, and shoving it back in her face? In what world that you live in is that an okay thing to do? If your partner, your sister, or a friend or family member did something similar, and the outcome was the same, would you be okay with it being shared with the world? Laughed about amongst your bros? Your loved ones shamed for being naked?

If you answered yes to the above, I feel sorry for your friends and family. I also get the feeling you tell girls not to wear revealing clothes so they don't get raped. Or that blackface is a bit of a laugh.

As Tigerlily responded this morning:

Although the crime that has been committed is NOT OK, being proud of your body and who you are IS OK. Girls - Do not ever be ashamed of your body. Do not ever let anyone else ever treat you with anything but absolute respect. You and your body are completely perfect just the way you are and you all deserve to know that and be told that each and every day.

We don’t get to decide what women can or can’t do with their bodies. It’s really that simple.

How should we remember XXXTentacion after his death?

Hip-hop's "next big thing" was killed overnight, but how do we mourn an artist plagued by allegations of abuse?

6 years ago

The Death Penalty Just Isn't Rational

An attempt to dissect the arguments of those who think otherwise.

9 years ago

Rediscovering Human Decency When We Need It Most

Instead of pigeonholing people, it's time to start talking to them.

7 years ago

Tia Gostelow, on the complex journey to self-acceptance as an Indigenous Australian

In a powerful new piece, the musician reflects on the complexities of being a lighter-skinned Indigenous role model.

3 years ago